babarnett: (puppet angel)
babarnett ([personal profile] babarnett) wrote2010-10-26 11:41 pm

The Writerly Update: The Case of the Broken Compass

My internal writerly compass has been feeling a little on the broken side.  Perhaps my muse, being a surly plumber named Jim Bob, has some sort of magnetic contraption in his tool kit that's throwing my readings off.

I know we're generally our own worst critics, but lately I've been trusting my own judgment even less than usual.  Why does this story click while this other one that I thought was equally awesome doesn't?  Clearly there's a difference, but it beats the hell out of me what that difference is.  And Jim Bob ain't helping.  He's crouched down under the sink with his butt crack showing, muttering, "I'm the idea guy.  What you do with them's your problem."
 
And then the judgment distrust starts trickling down from the macro to the micro level as I write.  Does this scene actually work?  I think so, but I also thought that other thing worked before all those responses suggested otherwise.  And what about this paragraph? And this transition?  What about that sentence? Or that word?  This bit of punctuation?  Am I even writing in English?

With all of that going on in my head, I've ended up writing only about 800 words over the last four weeks.  That's a bit pathetic.  Normally I could excuse that by saying revisions are generally slower, but since where I'm currently at with My Big Fat Epic Fantasy Novel involved writing a whole new scene that I should have been able to spew out fairly quickly (the aforementioned 800 words), my excuse is kind of crap.

Time to see if I can get a good deal on a new compass, or at least figure out what's screwing my current one up.  If it's not Jim Bob messing with it, then I suspect my internal editor.  She's been looking a little shifty lately.

[identity profile] bogwitch64.livejournal.com 2010-10-27 02:04 pm (UTC)(link)
Those 800 words aren't a good indicator of the work you've done. I stopped doing a word count during revision. Sometimes, I'll work for hours on revisions with no measureable change in word count, but I've bloody well done a hell of a lot of good for the manuscript.

If something's not working for you, change the POV, change the setting, change something. You don't necessarily have to KEEP that change, but looking at it a different way often helps in seeing what went wrong. It's like when you're looking at a painting and then someone flicks on another light, and all of a sudden, there are carnivorous zombie-birds in the trees over that lovers' picnic that you hadn't seen before. Shazam! A little change and it's a whole new picture.

[identity profile] babarnett.livejournal.com 2010-10-27 02:48 pm (UTC)(link)
The thing is, though, I don't know if anything has gone wrong. I can change it up (and have...this revision has been all about changing it up), but I don't trust my judgment enough right now to know if the change is good or bad or if it even made a difference. Instead of having an aha! moment upon seeing the carnivorous zombie-birds, seeing a whole new picture leaves me wondering if it's the right new picture, or if it was better when I didn't see the lurking horror in the trees, or if I shouldn't have included a scene with trees and picnicking lovers in the first place. It's like my gut instincts are off on vacation somewhere, kicking back with a pina colada and a cabana boy and ignoring my phone calls.

[identity profile] bogwitch64.livejournal.com 2010-10-27 03:14 pm (UTC)(link)
Do you have a crit group? Or at least one other set of eyes on your work?

[identity profile] babarnett.livejournal.com 2010-10-27 03:32 pm (UTC)(link)
Yup. Which is normally very helpful, because normally I'm good at sifting through what's useful to me and what's not, and what, while pointing to one issue for the critiquer, actually makes me see that there's a deeper or different issue going on. But with my gut out gallivanting with cabana boys, other sets of eyes just leave me more confused than anything right now. "It's really well written, but...", except all the buts are different. I'd kill for some uniform but-age about now.

I suspect that this is mostly job stress and me having been sick a big chunk of days putting me in a state of temporary kerfuddledness. Maybe after a relaxing weekend of Halloween candy and bad horror movies, my gut will be back from vacation. :)